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Valentine’s For Who? All You Need Is You

To loving yourself unconditionally.

BY Pauline Katethya

Feb 02, 2023, 10:11 AM

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Valentine’s is almost coming to life. It has been lurking in the shadows, walking in the streets silently, people talking about it in hushed tones but soon, it will no longer be invisible. It will ram into the limelight and no one will be able to hide or ignore it. 

Those who treasure it will be all over the moon, while to some it’ll be another ordinary day. If you ask me, Valentine’s Day is overrated. It’s about the haves and have-nots. Those who have received flowers and gifts and those who haven’t. Those who are in relationships and those who never get a good morning babe message, come sunrise. But, does it have to be this way?

I’m here to tell you that all you need for Valentine’s is you. Here’s why. 

You Are The Love Of Your Life.

As cliche as it sounds, yes, you are your soulmate. The one God kept for you. As women, we have been taught to stand in a line waiting for someone to love and choose us, but no one teaches us how to love or choose ourselves

We anxiously and hopefully wait for a prince charming who will ride with us into the sunset, but how do we expect someone to give us love and happiness we haven’t shown ourselves?

Fall in love with yourself so that when someone else comes into the picture, you rise in love. We have to build homes in ourselves before we build them in other people. Because if they walk away, they’ll go with everything we've ever known and our souls will be left empty.

You Are All You Have. 

All the times you been on your knees after life served you with blows? Who was there for you? Who picked you up? You. Remember, you are the constant person in your life. After everything is said and done, all you have left is you. 

You’ve been able to grow through everything that was meant to destroy you. You’ve experienced endings many times, but you are still here. And that’s the person who needs you the most. That’s the person who deserves your affection, gentleness, support, and unconditional love. 

This is why you need to put yourself first and love yourself enough so as to pour into other people. As the saying goes, you can’t pour from an empty cup, but unfortunately, most times we neglect and abandon ourselves and expect other people to treat us differently. 

Everything You Are Looking For is Already Within You.

Since we haven’t been taught to love ourselves, we will look for love, approval, and validation in the wrong places.  Sometimes, we experience immense pain while trying to make people love us, yet we don’t see ourselves. 

We don’t love ourselves fiercely enough to appreciate ourselves. A you are beautiful comment will leave you in awe because you barely believe you are beautiful.

We need to be firmly grounded in ourselves so that nothing, no matter how strong, uproots us from who we are. We all need and deserve a beautiful place where we are loved unconditionally, where judgment and criticism don’t exist, a place where we can truly be ourselves and that place lives in us. 

You Are Worth It.

You are deserving of everything beautiful and more. Being single or in a relationship on Valentine’s day isn’t supposed to be a big deal. Normlize taking yourself out on solo dates, buying yourself flowers, and going on solo trips. 

Spend time with yourself, read books, and indulge in your favorite wine, because why not? We are taught to give the best parts of ourselves to other people such that we are left with leftovers and that shouldn’t be the case. 

Soft life, happiness, and peace are your portion. Immerse yourself and thrive in your glory and femininity because you deserve to. There’s no reward for suffering. So, whatever happens, or doesn’t happen, remember you are the real MVP here. 

It’s Not That Serious. 

Valentine’s day isn’t a life-or-death situation. The hype will eventually fade. No one will die from not receiving gifts or flowers or chocolate. The day will end and the following day no one will give a damn about what happened. 

But you know who will still be here? You. So continue loving yourself, showing up for yourself, and choosing yourself. Remember, you are the star of your show and are allowed to rewrite your story as many times as you need to. Your power is within you, so walk with your head held high sis.