Post main image
Photo by


Signs He Knows He Hurt You And He Is Sorry

How does your man show remorse?

BY Mercy Kipchilat

Mar 14, 2023, 08:23 AM

Photo by

A few nights ago, you had a big misunderstanding with your partner and in the heat of the moment, he said or did something that hurt you.

Although hurting each other in relationships is inevitable, how couples handle the damage they have caused to each other is what makes or breaks a relationship

You know you're with a good man when he realizes he's hurt you, feels bad about it, and tries to make things right.

If you are wondering if he regrets his actions, here are 5 sure signs he knows he hurt you and he is sorry.

He Apologizes

A sincere and heartfelt apology is the ultimate admission of wrongdoing and it is the first sign he knows he hurt you.

In some cultures, men are brought up to believe that apologizing to a woman makes them “weak” or  “less of a man,” so if he is willing to acknowledge his mistake and apologize, then it shows that he really feels guilty for hurting you.

However, you should be wary that his apology could be a ruse to get you off his back. Remember that a genuine apology should be unconditional, demonstrate remorse for wrongdoing, and include a promise to learn from mistakes or not to repeat the mistake.

So, if he forces you to accept his apology, or if his apology is full of complaints or justification for his actions and blame-shifting, then it’s a fake apology and he’s really not sorry.

He Is Willing To Talk About What Happened

Photo by Diva Plavalaguna
Besides owning up to his mistake, another sign that he knows he hurt you is that he wants to talk about what happened, as uncomfortable as it makes him. 

Instead of changing the topic or making an excuse to leave the room when you bring up the topic of how he wounded your heart, does he actually pay attention to you when you tell him how his actions made you feel? Does he try to look for the right words when revisiting the situation? Well, he sure knows he hurt you.

After hurting you, his mind might have been blurry and he is now trying to understand how you feel in order to make amends. Having a healthy conversation is a good sign because it shows that he is self-aware, mature, and ready to handle issues in a healthy manner.

He Makes An Effort To Make Things Right

A healthy sign that shows he knows he hurt you is if he avoids doing what he did to hurt you and he makes an effort to be a better person.

If he is willing to change his actions and habits just to accommodate you then it means that he cares deeply about you and is afraid of losing you.

He Is Nicer Than Usual

Photo by Budgeron Bach
Another sign that shows you that he knows he hurt you is if he treats you more nicely than he usually does.

Does he buy you random gifts or send you airtime without you asking? Does he offer to help with the chores at home without you asking? He is probably guilty as hell and trying to compensate for hurting you.

He Checks Up On You

Although it’s normal for couples to check in on each other on a regular basis, if you notice that he puts in a little extra effort on this part, then it’s a sign he knows he hurt you.

If his conscience is clouded by guilt for his actions and he requires reassurance that you are okay, he will probably call you or text you several times a day just to know how you are doing. 

He will also try to cheer you up and make you smile, just so he can feel better himself.