We go through life demanding a lot from it, when sometimes all it wants us to do, is sit down and have a banana.
We are always in a hurry. A hurry to settle down and get children before we get old. A hurry to live big. A hurry to buy the car of our dreams. A hurry to get to the elevator before it closes. A hurry to cross the road. A hurry to leave the washroom and move on with life. A hurry to finish one project and embark on the next one. And sometimes, we get so caught up that we lose ourselves and forget where we are heading to.
Growing up has taught me how to slow down. Slow down and accept that there are things I have no control over. That sometimes life has plans for us and our loved ones that are far beyond our grasp. That being an adult most times isn’t about figuring things out. It’s about taking a step forward in the right direction, even though you’ll head in the wrong direction, and get lost on your way back. And you’ll wonder why you even bothered moving.
When I graduated from school, I thought things would get easier. Easier because I’d land a big job and have lots of money. Little did I know that it never gets easier, you just get better and stronger. I wish life had a manual, to guide you through things, but it doesn’t. No one prepares you for the punches you’ll get on the face, for the hard fall capable of breaking your knees, or for the kicks that’ll hurt your ribs. You just deal with what you can, how you can, until you get better.
Sometimes, the future seems so distant, very blurry and uncertain, and I wonder, will I ever get there? But then again, do you ever get there? Is there a place you reach and say you’ve made it? When is enough enough? And at what point do you stop running and decide that you are going to slow down and start walking or jogging?
It’s unfortunate that we live in a world that puts timelines to everything. Deadlines to our dreams, love, and lots of things. We forget that it’s the progress that counts. And that things work out and sometimes they don’t. Because in life anything that can go right, can go wrong.
Here are some lessons I’ve learnt in the world of adulthood that might or might not be of use to you, because what do I know?
Life goes on. No matter what.
There are early and late bloomers. It’s okay to be either.
Freedom isn’t the same for girls.
Sometimes, it’s good to ask yourself what life expects of you, rather than what you expect from it.
Love dies hard.
There are days that will drain you. Days that’ll make you feel like a failure, and you won’t want to get out of bed, but you’ll have to, because you gotta pee.
Some people are bridges to someone else.
You don’t need to see the whole staircase, as long as you are taking the one step in front of you, then that’s what matters the most.
You never see it coming. You never see the exact second your life changes forever.
You’ll never be ready. You just take a leap of faith.
You don’t deserve people just because you like them.
There is a reason for your existence. Even if it’s to eat bananas.
Things can go from bad to worse.
Shit happens to you even when you have a shit shield on.
People change. Friendships change. And sometimes, there’s nothing you can do about it.
Life is unpredictable and fragile.
Love isn’t always enough. Just because you love somebody and they love you back doesn’t mean your relationship makes sense, or it’s a good one for both of you to be in.
The world owes you nothing. No one owes you anything.
You can’t raise a man out of a boy and vice versa.
Read: Your Man Is Our Man
Read: Your Man Is Our Man