A month ago, my friend went to his SACCO for a loan. He was making plans to surprise this woman he had been dating for a few weeks. He was thrilled to be with her. You see, he thought she was out of his league and he wanted to bring his A-game to their first Valentines. It was going to seal the deal for him.
With the Ksh 200,000 loan, he booked flights and a weekend of fun, sun, and sand in Malindi for him and his woman. On D-day, everything was going according to plan until they got to the hotel and she realized that he had booked just one room for both of them and she hit the roof. How could he do that? Why did he assume she was going to sleep with him without him asking her first? Did he think she was a whore?
They had a huge fight which ended in her getting a cab back to the airport and him staying an entire weekend alone in a beachfront hotel. Now he is back home, single, and starting to service a loan he can’t even afford.
“Did I have to spell it out? Isn’t it obvious that if a guy asks you for a romantic weekend away he expects that there will be sex?” he wonders.
There you have it, ladies! That weekend away may mean many things to you. It may mean that he really likes you, that he is romantic, or even that he is just a busy Nairobian looking for some quiet. To him, it means that if your relationship hasn’t turned physical yet, if he asks to go away with him for the weekend, he is asking to get into your panties. He hopes that there will be sex. Lots of it. If you agree to go, you will do well to pack some lingerie.
Go Easy On The Titles
The expectation of sex is one thing but his being in a relationship with you is a different thing. In asking you to go away with him, he didn’t ask you to make your relationship official or exclusive. That is a whole other conversation.
Don’t start posting photographs on social media tagging your bae if you are not sure. You don’t want to have a ruined weekend when his actual bae slides into your DM claiming her man. Know exactly where the two of you stand beforehand. Normalize the ‘what are we?’ conversation. It will save you lots of heartbreak.
Seeing The Real You
When he says, he can’t wait to have you to himself all weekend, he also means that he can’t wait to see the real you without all the makeup and hair extensions. It is impossible to keep up all your routines an entire weekend. Are you ready for him to see your bare skin and messy hair? Are you ready to have an audience for all those weird bedtime rituals? Yes? Go ahead and confirm your reservations.
The Exit Plan
Finally, after making sure that both of you are on the same page about things, have an exit plan. Is there a hotel you can afford nearby or is your destination one of those hotels on an island with nothing around it for miles? Do you have the cash to cover your cost? You don’t want to be detained or have to peel potatoes or wash dishes in a hotel miles away from home because you can’t pay your bill. Play it safe.
Read: The Lies Kenyan Men Tell
Read: The Lies Kenyan Men Tell