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Vitae London


You Are Exactly Where You Need To Be

You don't have to know why something is happening in your life right now

BY Karen Muriuki

Dec 06, 2022, 08:17 AM

Photo by

Vitae London
A number of friends in my circle are older than me. Three years, at the very least. And each of them is successful and thriving in their own right.

I find myself making comparisons way too many times. You know- why does Pato have this and I don’t? Why has El done this yet I’ve never come close to that experience? Why can Jess do this and I can’t? That’s just me! I’m only human. Haha!

(Relax, I’m not using any of their real names.)

And it often takes a session of my usual overthinking sessions for me to calm myself and tell myself, ‘Hold up. These guys are way older than you. They’re bound to have had more experiences and all the nice things they have. They also had to start from somewhere.’

I feel better instantaneously. Sometimes, even proud of myself for what I’ve been able to accomplish at my age. But most importantly, I get to learn to trust the process- the process that I’m in. 

Trusting the process means letting go, it means releasing your stronghold on life and embracing that some things will fall apart and some will fall together, but whatever happens will shape you, grow you, and build you into who you’re meant to be.

The most ironic thing, though, is that it’s always the moments I let go that everything falls into place. It’s always when I surrender and stop worrying over things I can’t change or fix, that they somehow fix themselves.

Sometimes, we spend so much of our time and energy hoping for things that we think are right, only to find out that fate was leading us in an entirely different direction. We agonize, stress, and- you know, freak out over decisions that aren’t even ours to make, only to learn that the events are unfolding exactly how we didn’t imagine—and yet, it’s exactly right somehow.

If I think about every moment in my life that I worried over, it always leads me back to this single truth: the good things fall into place when I trust the process.

It's scary to trust the process. It's scary to let go of your control and just let it be. You can't always have a plan- and even if you do have one, you can't always execute it. This is okay, because it is a part of the process.

You do not have to know why what's happening in your life right now —be it a breakup, a job loss, death of a loved one, a failing grade, is happening. There are things that are beyond reason. So it is okay to let go. You do not have to know why it's happening. All you have to know is that whatever is happening is happening for good.

It isn't until you give up the illusion that you have control over anything that is happening that you can start to fully and completely let go, live your life, and watch what amazing things can happen. Because amazing things will happen, whether you're killing yourself trying to force them to happen or not.

Girl! Imagine who you could be if you stopped focusing all of your time and energy into worrying and trying to control things, and instead chose to learn from each and every moment.

Every day, I try to take at least one thing I'm worried about or that I'm trying to control and let it go. I remember that the fact that I am standing here is proof enough that everything really does work out for good.

You are exactly where you are meant to be, you just have to trust in the process.

Read: The Struggles Of An Over Thinker