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Fabian Moller


5 Things To Do When You're Not Feeling Okay

Number One: Accept that you are not okay

BY Pauline Katethya

May 16, 2023, 08:15 AM

Photo by

Fabian Moller
Life, as it is, has many challenges. One day things are going well, the next day they aren’t. One moment you are healthy, the next you are sick. Today you have your job and the next minute, you have lost everything you thought defined you. Life gets us at some point and unfortunately, no one ever knows the exact moment their life changes forever.

It’s so easy to get caught up with life. When we can’t get our chaos under control, things can get overwhelming. Sometimes it feels like the end. We wonder how we can get back up when we feel empty, drained, emotionally, and physically tired. 

We all have bad days when our skin doesn’t feel like ours and our body doesn’t feel at home. When you are having such days, here is what you can do to feel better. 

Accept That You Are Not Okay.

As humans, we have perfected the art of pretending our lives are okay, our families, our jobs, and our well-being. We are used to hiding underneath masks and smiling even though deep down, we are in pieces. 

In this age where vulnerability is seen as a weakness, it’s okay to admit that you are not okay, that you are struggling with something. It’s okay to confess you are sad. It’s okay to feel the emotions. 

To let them run right through you. This is part of processing everything and part of healing. Sometimes you have to allow yourself to be who you are, where you are, without resisting. 

Talk To Someone. 

Talking to someone is like opening a window in your life and when the window is open, light floods the room and so much more. It not only makes you feel better but also reminds you that you are not alone.

When we are going through something we tend to hide because we are ashamed of our problem especially when everyone seems to have their life figured out.

Truth is, everyone is struggling with something and when we open up, the load gets a little bit lighter. There are also times when the answer to our problems lies with other people.

I used to believe that being a strong woman meant keeping things to yourself as you try to figure things out, but I learned that being strong means removing the brave face and letting other people be there for you and supporting you.

Do Something You Love. 

Listen to your favourite song. Read that novel you have been longing to read. Take a walk. Cook. Sleep. Watch a movie. Try something new, maybe paint, meditate, do yoga, or just do something that will lift your spirits or get you in a good mood. 

Stand-up comedies do the trick for me and after laughing my head off, I usually feel better. This distraction might help because the more you focus on emotion, the more powerful it becomes. And this makes it harder to make any progress. 

Try To Identify Solutions.

Have a meeting with yourself and analyze your situation. Find out if there are solutions to your problems. If there are, find a way of making them work and if they aren’t, is there a way you can live with them? 

Problems are constant in life and the solution to one problem is the creation of the next one. If it’s something beyond your control, you need to let go because some things are beyond your grasp. 

I love the serenity prayer that reminds us to accept the things we cannot change, to have the courage to change the things we can, and the wisdom to know the difference. No matter what, we must try to move lightly despite our burdens and learn how to rest when we need to.

Remember It's Temporary. 

When we are going through something, our brains make us feel as if that’s our reality, but it isn’t. It’s easy to forget that we are having a bad day and that does not necessarily mean a bad life.

Life is a series of losses and gains, and we must learn how to deal with the losses. Things change and we must not feel stuck. Life has a way of working out and brighter days are yet to come.

Read: Here's Why You Need To Own Your Beauty